The Smart One
by Weaz0r
Summary: It’s always been assumed that, if any of the two were going to turn to crime, it would be Zack, but one must never make assumptions.
1. Chapter 1: Krickett Dyers

**Author's Note: Okay, first of all, this should be obvious, but I don't own any of the characters in this chapter, nor do I own the _Suite Life of Zack and Cody._ Zack, Maddie, and Cody are from the _Suite Life of Zack and Cody_ on the Disney Channel, and I borrowed the character of Krickett Dyers from a friend of mine. This is rated T for language and "adult situations."**

**Summary: It's always been assumed that, if any of the two were going to turn to crime, it would be Zack, but one must never make assumptions.**

**Hope you enjoy it!**

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"I've got a date!"

Zack Martin did not bother to look up from the television; he didn't need to. He just laughed, and played along with his brother's joke by replying, "With whom? Esteban?"

"Haha, your lack of wit always ceases to astound me, but no. I'm serious. I've really got a date."

This time, Zack pried his eyes away from the TV to fully look at Cody, who seemed to be rather excited about this piece of information, despite that he seemed to be a little disappointed by Zack's doubt. "I'm sorry, man, but I can't see you asking out anybody."

Cody's grin faded a little, and he hesitated a bit before saying, "Well, er, no. She sort of asked me out."

This time it was Zack's turn to grin. "Well, what does she look like?"

"It's not the appearance that matters, but what is on the inside, and-,"

"She's ugly, isn't she?" Zack interrupted.

"You know what? You're extremely idiotic." With that, Cody stormed out of the room in what, according to Zack's opinion, was a very feminine way.

Shrugging his shoulders, he leaned back on the couch, crossed his arms above his head and rested the back of his neck against them. "Yup," he muttered to himself, "she must be ugly."

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It wasn't very long until Zack got bored of sitting there laughing at his brother's stupidity, so he got up and went downstairs, his whole mission being to annoy Maddie.

However, as soon as he arrived at the lobby, Maddie was already talking to somebody. Cody. So Zack decided to hide out in the background and eavesdrop, just in time to hear Cody finish his sentence, "…So yeah, and I didn't even have to say, 'Hey, sweet thang!' to get her attention."

Zack scowled. What an ass. What was really scary about it was that although Cody was rolling his eyes, and his tone obviously mocking, it was all-in-all a sickeningly good impression of Zack.

What was even worse was that Maddie had actually found that funny. She snickered a little, and then asked, "Well, how old is she?"

"Fifteen."

Zack's eyebrows went up and his eyes widened considerably. Fifteen? What the hell?

Maddie was obviously as shocked as Zack was; only she did a better job of hiding it. Her eyebrows went up slightly, and she coughed a little, but other than that, she showed no signs that she really cared. "Fifteen, eh? I might know her. What's her name?"

"Krickett Dyers."

This time, Maddie did not do such a brilliant job in masking her shock. She somehow contorted her face to form a mixture of frustration, amusement, and puzzlement all at once. "Krickett? Krickett Dyers? You've got to be kidding me. What would she be doing with a kid like you?"

"Well, she told me, uhm… She told me that nerds were her type."

"Based on what I know about her, I wasn't aware she had a type."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Was he dense? And here to think that some people thought Cody was the smarter out of the twins.

"It means that she's a slut-faced ho," Zack clarified to him, in one of the most direct ways possible.

Only after both Maddie and Cody stared at him in disbelief did he realize that he completely revealed that he'd been eavesdropping on the whole conversation. Aw well, too late now. Cody would get over it eventually.

It took him a minute to regain himself, but then he said, trying and failing to sound confident, "She is not. Tell him, Maddie. Tell him that's not what you meant."

But Maddie looked as if she'd rather not take sides, and said, in a pathetic attempt to change the topic, "Anything interesting happen today, Zack?"

She was ignored.

Cody would have shouted at that point, but he was in the lobby in broad daylight, so he just said quietly, both his teeth and fists clenched, "You're just jealous because you don't even have a girlfriend."

Zack wasn't so concerned that he was in public. He yelled, "I'm saving myself for Maddie!" He looked and sounded serious, but he did take the time to grin and wink at Maddie, who, in turn, rolled her eyes and sarcastically said, "Thanks, Zack."

"No problem, babe."

Cody, however, was still angry. He shouted, "I'm leaving!" Then before any of them could get another word in, he stormed out of the hotel.

Zack turned to Maddie, grinning. "Wow, he sure told me off."

But Maddie wasn't grinning. "I'm seriously worried about Cody. Krickett Dyers is bad news. I don't want him to get in trouble."

Zack just shrugged and said unconvincingly, "He'll be fine."

When Maddie didn't say anything else, Zack shrugged again and went up the elevator to the 23rd floor.

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Cody was rushing down the street near tears, and the sight in front of him didn't exactly help his mood. Across the street, he saw his girlfriend… With two other guys. Running across the road (thank God there were no cars coming) he yelled, panicking, "What are you doing with _them_?"

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**Author's Note: M'kay, that's it! I hope you liked it!**

**I'll be doing more chapters later, since leaving it as it is now would be the worst ending ever. I should have the second chapter up in a week or so. **

**Review, please?**


	2. Chapter 2: Curly and Donovan

**Disclaimer: The Zack and Cody plot and characters do not belong to me. Neither do Curly and Krickett. Those two belong to my friend. Donovan is all mine, though.**

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Krickett turned around to face Cody in surprise, before giving a very fake-sounding laugh. "Cody, these are my _friends_! You need to relax."

She was smiling, and seemed to think of it as one big joke, but Cody still frowned at the two guys she was with. Both of them were at least a foot taller than he was – not exactly a comforting fact – and they both looked like they could kill him with their bare hands fairly easily. One of them already looked annoyed by Cody's entrance. The other one was a little more harmless-looking, with a spacey grin like he really didn't know or care where he was.

He turned his attention back to Krickett when she started speaking again. "Cody, what's wrong?" Her grin was starting to fade. Krickett was one of those oddly perceptive people that could practically read other people's minds. Cody usually liked girls who could connect with other people's emotions. However, at this certain time, he really didn't.

Still, he lied to her. "Nothing. Nothing's wrong." And he gave a rather unconvincing smile that Krickett could see right through.

"Liar."

Cody took a deep breath. There was no point in continuing to lie. Besides, the truth would set him free.

"Well, I was talking to Maddie. I think you know her. Maddie Fitzpatrick…"

Krickett didn't let him finish his sentence. "Maddie Fitzpatrick? You actually talk to her?"

Before Cody could say anything else, Krickett walked away angrily and disappeared into the traffic of people on the sidewalk. He looked back at the two men; the one that was annoyed to begin with was glaring at him with even more dislike, while the other was still grinning.

The happy one spoke first. "Who are you? Krickett said something about you, but I can't keep track of all of her boyfriends' names."

Wow, that was reassuring. But Cody answered, as politely as he could for going through so many disturbing events that day, "Hello, I'm Cody Martin. Who are you?"

"I'm Curly and the grumpy person next to me is Donovan."

Cody blinked. Had he misheard the name? "Curly?"

This time Donovan spoke, his tone impatient, "Like the Stooge."

Cody was going to ask if that was a nickname or if his parents had actually named him after one of the Three Stooges, but he didn't really want to anger Donovan any more than he already had. So he simply said, "Oh."

With none of them saying anything else, Cody took time to examine the two guys. Curly had messy dark brown hair that spiked upwards with equally as dark brown eyes. He was sort of muscular, but due to his height, he seemed sort of lanky and thin.

The other one, Donovan, was taller and more muscular than Curly was. He had neatly cut dirty blond hair and also had brown eyes.

Finally, Donovan broke the silence with, "Go home, kid. You already pissed off Krickett, and she could probably beat you up. I'd advise that you leave now before she comes back."

Cody resisted the urge to smirk. Krickett was almost the exact same height as him and was petite. She had brown hair that fell in curls. She seemed to be way too girly and cute to be able to punch anyone. A strong wind could probably beat her up.

Curly, however, said, "The kid can stay. He seems fun."

Donovan rolled his eyes, and even with Curly's assurance, Cody felt unwelcome. It didn't help that they kept referring to him as "the kid." So he said, "Nah, I'll just go. I only live across the street. See you later, I guess."

He started to walk away, but Donovan called after him disbelievingly, "What are you smokin', kid? You can't live at the Tipton!"

"Yeah, I do live there…"

Curly's grin widened, and he said, "I want to go! Let's go!"

He and Cody started to walk across the street, while Donovan reluctantly followed.

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"London!"

London Tipton looked around to see who was calling her name, until she finally found the owner of the voice. Oh, Maddie. What did she want?

Gliding over to the candy counter, London raised an eyebrow, "Yes?"

Maddie sighed. She wasn't sure why she was confiding her worry to London of all people, but London was friends with Krickett. Maybe London would be able to talk some sense into her friend. "Listen, I've been worried about Cody."

London didn't wait until Maddie finished her statement. She put an expression of concern onto her face, and said, "Oh, I've been worried about Cody too! Have you seen those vests that he wears? Ugh, they're awful! And those shoes of his…"

Maddie sighed again as London continued to rant about how Cody's shoes were clearly unfashionable, and how his hair was too greasy. She knew talking to London would be a bad idea. How could she possibly think that London could talk sense into anybody when London didn't have any sense herself?

"No, London, that's not why I'm worried. Actually…"

But London wasn't paying attention, and instead had turned to the door of the Tipton where Cody entered with two other men.

"Look Maddie! There are two cute guys!"

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Cody blinked as both Maddie and London went running past him and straight towards Curly and Donovan. Then they shamelessly flirted with the two guys. London was in a conversation with Curly, while Maddie tried to talk to Donovan.

"Hi! I'm London, and you're almost as good-looking as I am!"

Curly smiled. "That must mean I'm drop-dead gorgeous, then."

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Maddie was having less luck than London.

"Hi! I'm Maddie! Actually, that's not my real name, but most people call me Maddie. What's your name?"

For the first time in that whole day, Donovan smiled. "Donovan. Hey, you look familiar. You remind me of the feathered yellow thing on Sesame Street."

London cut into their conversation. "Oh, you mean Big Bird? Yeah, I've told her that before, too! It's because her hair is so frizzy, and it doesn't really help that her nose looks like a beak."

Maddie shot a glare at London before walking back to the candy counter. Cody was probably smarter than the other three combined.

With that, London grabbed Curly's hand and started to lead him away. Cody could only catch the first bit of their conversation, which London was telling her new friend, "I'm going to introduce you to Mr. Moseby. I'm sure he'll absolutely adore you."

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Donovan rolled his eyes, as if the two girls were no more than an irritating interruption. He looked down at Cody and said, "Well, where do you live? The lobby?"

"No. It's a suite on the 23rd floor. I'll show you. Follow me."

As much as Cody didn't like Donovan, he wasn't about to let Donovan speak to him like he was an idiot. He was going to prove to Donovan that he wasn't lying.

They made it up the elevator, and Cody knocked on the door to their suite, since Cody didn't have his room key with him. But he knew that Zack was in the room and would let them in unless if he was still angry about their fight from earlier that day.

Sure enough, Zack opened the door and Cody stepped inside. However, before Donovan had the chance to enter the room, too, Zack slammed the door in his face.

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**Author's Note: Okay, that's Chapter 2. Sorry it took so long to update!**

**Review, please?**


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